Guest writer Blog – Conflict at work: The hidden impact on stress and mental health
How confident are you that people in your organisation feel able to speak up when something isn’t right? And most importantly, how do you know?
In many workplaces, there’s an underlying assumption that if conflict exists, employees will raise it. Particularly where managers feel comfortable handling difficult conversations, it can be easy to believe that others feel the same.
But that’s not always the case.
Conflict is often shaped by power dynamics. What feels like a straightforward conversation for a manager may feel significantly more difficult for an employee, especially where there is a perceived (or very real) imbalance of authority. Concerns about being judged, misunderstood, or facing negative consequences can lead people to stay silent, even when something is affecting them and as a result, conflict doesn’t disappear. Instead, it gets swept under the carpet.
Workplace conflict is often treated as something to smooth over quickly or avoid altogether. Yet in reality, it’s rarely the conflict itself that causes the greatest harm, it’s how long it goes unaddressed and how ill-equipped people feel to deal with it.
In many organisations, conflict sits quietly beneath the surface: a conversation avoided, a frustration left unspoken, a relationship that becomes increasingly strained. Over time, this doesn’t just affect teamwork or performance, it impacts people’s mental health.
When we experience conflict, our brain registers it as a threat. Even low-level tension can trigger a stress response, raising cortisol levels and putting us on alert. If this becomes a pattern: ongoing friction, unresolved disagreements, or a sense of walking on eggshells- stress can quickly become chronic.
This is not just anecdotal. The Health and Safety Executive (HSE) identifies poor workplace relationships and unresolved conflict as key contributors to work-related stress, anxiety, and depression. Similarly, research from the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD) shows that a significant proportion of employees’ experience conflict at work, with clear links to reduced wellbeing, lower engagement, and increased absence.
What’s particularly important is that many people don’t feel confident addressing conflict when it arises. Without the skills, language, or sense of psychological safety to navigate it, they may avoid it altogether or raise it only when it has escalated. And both responses tend to increase stress rather than reduce it.
The encouraging reality is that conflict, when handled well, can strengthen relationships and lead to better outcomes. The difference lies in how we respond in the moment and whether people feel able to respond at all.
Here are three simple but powerful techniques to manage immediate conflict more constructively:
Pause before reacting
When something triggers us, our instinct is often to respond quickly. Pausing, even briefly, gives your nervous system a chance to settle and helps you respond more thoughtfully rather than reactively. This small shift can prevent escalation and create space for a more constructive conversation. Get a drink or a notepad and pen to write notes on if needed. This might give you long enough to take a breath, assess next steps and prepare.
Don’t assume intent
In moments of tension, it’s easy to assume the worst about someone’s motives. These assumptions can quickly fuel further conflict. Instead, stay curious. Ask questions, seek to understand their perspective, and separate impact from intent. This often diffuses defensiveness and opens up dialogue.
Name what’s happening, calmly
Avoiding conflict rarely makes it disappear. In fact, it often intensifies. Gently naming the issue, without blame, can be a powerful step forward. For example: “I sense there may be some tension here, can we talk it through?” This creates an opportunity to address concerns early, before they escalate.
Developing these skills is not simply about improving communication, it’s about supporting mental health at work. When people feel able to handle difficult conversations, they experience less stress, greater confidence, and stronger working relationships.
For organisations, this is an important shift in perspective. Conflict management is not a “nice to have” soft skill. It’s a core component of any effective wellbeing strategy. Creating an environment where people feel safe, to speak up is key.
while conflict is inevitable in any workplace, the impact it has on people’s wellbeing is not ❤️